A Blessing or a Curse?
From the desk of April….
To be both a mother and an educator… is it a blessing or a curse?
Will I ever know the answer?
I am blessed that I learned how to promote the love of literature to my children from Dr. Baker at Salem College. I know how valuable it is to do little things like point out letters on billboards to my oldest son. We started this when he was 1 and now it is a game we play with his younger brother.
Despite being an educator, I spend a lot of time worrying about my boys having positive experiences in school. I want them to feel supported and challenged just the right amount. I want them to WANT to learn and I wonder constantly how to make that happen for them.
I think my first step is to know when to keep my mouth shut. I know they will not always have teachers who will approach learning as I do and I have to have an open mind that the boys may just thrive in those classrooms despite my reservations. Is it possible to stand by and let them be molded by someone else for 8+ hours a day for an entire school year? I will be honest, that is really scary to me!
Just the other day, I was talking to a friend of mine who is also a mom and an educator. I was commiserating about how difficult it was to raise children who are all-encompassing: kind, loving, generous, smart, funny, friendly, healthy, etc. Add on the desires I have for them as people to “become” the best they can be while holding a job, being a loving, devoted wife/friend/sister/daughter/teacher… the list just goes on and on.
When I look back, I realize now that I was extremely judgmental of the families I worked with as a young, “baby teacher”. Despite thinking I would “never do this” or “never do that”, I find myself looking at my own child with a different lens. I work so hard to be a good mother and it really does mirror the efforts of being a good teacher.
Patience- some days there is enough!
Kindness/Empathy- yes, I do at least try to look like I am just as devastated that you can’t find that missing toy!
Love- fortunately that has come easily!
Disappointment- expecting the most and only getting about ½ still makes me crazy no matter what!
It is amazing how much I really feel like I did learn about parenting by being a teacher. I know for a fact that I will be the most annoying middle school parent ever. I will know my boys’ friends and they may hate me but I will try my very best to know something about their whereabouts and friends/families who have an influence on them. I saw so many “good kids” get mixed up too quickly with the “wrong crowd” because their parents thought that at the ripe old age of 13, they were “fine”. I learned even as a young teacher that middle school is when you need to be in the middle of things even more.
I wonder if my view will change in 9 years when I am sitting with a 13-year-old in my own house? Will I be judging someone else then? Will I have learned so many other valuable life lessons as an educator/mommy that there will be hundreds of other things I am concerned about?
I guess only time will tell… In the meantime, I better go fill out this Kindergarten registration form and, just like all other things in motherhood and in education, take it all one step at a time.